Meditation Nation

Let's meditate!!

Woo Hoo!!

Does that sound exciting or scary?

It's Halloween so both are appropriate responses.

It's also the dawn of a new era in our country's leadership and an economy made frightening by the media and well, the Dow and Jones and all those other names an symbols comin' up and going down and running amuck on long tickers and freaking us all the f-out.

This is where I find pause.

Because life is also happening.

Because, inhale...
The downpour of fear and frustration around us looming like heavy, thick and dark clouds that never seem to release into rain or release into the ether, coupled with the responsibilities we as individuals and families face enduring our 'new normal' in wonder, hope and doubt, attempting to behave like everything is alright; when we are in the stir of change; this can be alarming.
...and exhale.

What staggeringly negative words Laurie is using in her blog. What the fu?

I'm just addressing the obese, hot pink elephant in the room that's getting bigger and bigger and making it more and more difficult for us to breathe, smile and find peace amidst the tumult.

How is it possible to find Tadasana or mountain pose or stillness when all that is around us is changing and shifting?

It's super duper mucho important to find that time and space to clear out the clutter in the mind and body and connect with our inner source of goodness - our highest selves and our brightest light.

I know. It's hard for me to do it too.

Let's just sit down for a sec.
Turn off everything that makes a noise.
Listen to your own noise for a moment.
The noises outside.
Just pause and breathe as deeply as you can.
Observe and watch and don't stop the thoughts that might come in waves or roaring traffic in the mind, just watch.
And breathe.
And watch.
And sit.
And breathe.
And watch how everything settles. Like a snow globe. Put down your life and your city scene in the snow and watch as the little flecks settle to the bottom.
And breathe.
And notice.
And if you start feeling bad, smile.
And breathe.
And if you feel pain, say this...
taught legs, let loose so that I may walk with ease to the things I'm drawn to in passion and obligation.
tight tummy, let go and allow the strength of breath to fill me up and fuel me like a yummy meal.
tense shoulders; relax so that I can carry my confidence with ease.
clenched heart, let go so I can open myself up to love, of myself and those around me, including the people that might frustrate me.
closed throat, free the hold that is keeping me from expressing myself, speaking my truth and sharing good words and laughter with others.
strained mind, release so that I can think positive thoughts and turn up the light within so that I can nurture others and myself.
face, soften so I can smile and mean it.
head, liberate yourself from those people, energies, thoughts, stimulus that keep me from being present in every moment I have to live, good and bad, which is a gift.
And breathe.
And if that doesn't work...
you have real problems.
Kidding!
Seriously though, make your meditation more about sitting and plugging yourself into the cosmic source that makes your screen saver brighter and iTunes play louder.

If you want to look at yourself like some of our favorite technological gadgets, then there you go.
Nothing will bring us more joy than the energy, space, breath and recharged fuel we need to create and continue in times that might not be so efficient. We do it for our cars and our computers.
And, we have it all in us for ourselves and can drop into it whenever we want.
We can grab it when we chose it.
We can take it here and now.
We can take it to go and best of all...
it's free.

And you can be too.
I'm not only the hair club president. I'm also a member.
Gosh, I hope you get that.

Shanti Om,
Lokah samastha sukhino bhavantu,
Jai Ma,
Peace, peace, peace,
Laurie

Doctodrama

We interrupt our regularly scheduled blog programming about yoga and fitness to bring you this story...

Ok, I'm comin' out of the closet!!! The water closet that is. I'm sick and tired of keepin' it in and like my mother always says, "Better out than a poor man's eye!"
Over the last year, I have been battling strange (bladder and lady) symptoms that a gal at my age should not be battling. Let me be vague. Just 'cause I'm comin' out of the closet doesn't mean I have to show you what I left in there!!
I've seen 6 doctors of different specialties, none of which could really diagnosis me with anything in particular but were happy to charge me so much money that in toll, has cost me more than my first car.
My 'symptoms' have kept me from enjoying my life fully, doing the things I love and the things I hate too. It has taken me over.
At first, I was like, nah, to drugs and surgery. Now that we're at almost a year and a few grand in the hole with nothing to show for it, I'm like, bring it the F on. Give me mass quantities of drugs and surgeries et al.
What's wrong with you?!?!
I know. I'm still asking myself the same question.
Needless to say, what I 'have' is something old women or women with many children get, not a young vibrant girl like moi. No sirree.
I've been commuting down to Long Beach now for the last month to see the 'God-Doctor'. That's not his name. I'm protecting his name to protect those innocent around him.
Besides being 900 years old with the head the size of the great pumpkin, this guy is the complete opposite of good bedside manner. And yet, he is the 'God-doctor'. I can't imagine enduring him for one lecture let alone studying under his guidance.
Nurse Marissa, a lovely and quiet lass checks my vitals. At least I think that's what it’s called. That's what they say in Grey's Anatomy. Ya know, blood pressure, weight...height?!?! I haven't been heighted since the DMV, when I was 20 and blonde.
First trauma. I'm not 5' 8". Nope. I've been living my life thinking I was taller than I am.
I'm 5' 7" and I had her do it twice I was in such shock.
Then, my weight. Always a sore subject with any female. Yup, of course. You saw it coming to right? Gained three pounds. I haven't been eating a thing, I'm all stressed out and here are a few pounds to compound your stress.

Within moments of meeting my 6th doctor - the 'God-doctor,' he spoke few words, asked no questions, told me to 'relax' which you just about never say to anyone without it getting under their skin.
I start sobbing, something I rarely do and then he cleans his hands, walks out and tells me he'll see me next week for more testing.
Ok, well, how did this one go?
Cough, cough.
Oh, excuse me, that's just me choking on his dust. He was out of that room so fast. It took him no time to skewer me and yet I waited 55 minutes just to see him for two minutes.
That'll be $300 please.
This dude is old school and he has his series of tests you have to do weekly to give your 'organs' (to be vague), a break.
I leave the office, sobbing, uncontrollably now. I just want my mom and a cookie. Chocolate chip, to be precise. And warm, please.
I don't know what I would have done if it wasn't for Sylvia who promptly wrapped her arms around me and told me I would be ok.
I just needed to hear that, even though I knew. Thanks Sylvia.
And dear Surye for handing me tissues and telling me that everything was going to be ok, even though I wasn't so sure. Little angels in that office.
Do I get a plastic giraffe, a matchbox car or a piece of gum for this?
Just 'cause I'm not a kid anymore, doesn't mean I don't want a prize for getting through this exam.
And I'll have to wait for the cookie. I have a long drive ahead.
And so the weekly commute continues. Each week gets more unbearable. I bring a buddy the following week and the support was sooo needed.
More things being stuck up me.
I've spread my legs for more guys this year and, no, it was not good for me.
I make jokes to get through the moments. Marissa talks to me because 'God' doesn't know how to.
Mr. Personality tells me that my jokes are a defense mechanism an I explain to him that it's all part of my big performance, the one I'm going to do at the end of this nightmare. I will charge a large cover and only invite those in the medical profession.
I can see it now. There is a big musical number where I am supine, legs in a V and back up dancers in brightly colored scrubs and crocs kickin' it Rockette style while I sing a tune of epic grandeur about my life in a doctor's office.
What's wrong with that girl? She acts like she's got a rod up her.
Well, that's because I do.
Still no freekin' cookie.
Week three and I have to re-take a test that I already took less than six months ago. Apparently God doesn't think that the other doctors in his profession meet to his standards.
This test is the crescendo.
The one where there are so many things stuck in me, I may as well be a voodoo doll.
And, I'm alone.

Dr. P is playing the role of God and he is the complete opposite of 'bad' bedside manner. The man sat and listened to me tell him what I've been through over the last year, every symptom and doctor and woe. Not one doctor I have met, thus far, had the compassion and empathy I saw from this man and his staff.
Give him a rag and a bottle of Jack and he would have been a bar tender. And I would have been drunk.
And it might have actually made the test go over well. But alas, I was not.
God love him.
The real God, not the 'God-doctor'.
Although I knew what to expect with this test, it made it even worse. I knew what to expect, how painful it would be and how long it would take.
It didn't matter how much yogic breathing I did, I just could not relax.
All calm, yoga, relaxation, no matter how much I tried to control it, went out the window. It got to a point where I started to feel light headed, my hands and feet went numb AND they gnarled, curling in stiff weird directions. What the F!
I've never experienced that before.
The waterworks opened for business and I let it all go. The whole year of sobs, sadness, pain and frustration that I had held in and tried to hold together.
Dr. P tried to calm me down and Surye, 'The Great,' tried talking me down from the ledge I had apparently found myself on and did not know how to get off of without help.
I was so freaked, I had to call my mom.
Picture it, me supine, things stuck in me, doctor holding my hand, legs in a V, beautiful nurse in brightly colored scrubs and crocs and me, not singing a happy tune, but wailing like Snoopy to my mother. Sound familiar?
I'm at an age where I'm not quite sure the following exchange is acceptable. See below.
Me, between gasps, "Mom, I'm at the doctor."
Mom, "Are you OK? How did it go?"
Me, "No, you don't understand, I'm still here and I'm in pain and scared and freaking out. Like panic attack freak out."
Mom, "Well, when the doctor comes back in the room, tell him you already had the test and that they will have to accept the results of the test you took a few months ago."
Me, "Mom, the doctor is here, with me, holding my hand."
Mom, "He is!! Put him on the phone!! Let me talk to him!"

Hmmm, The rest, I couldn't hear.
My sobs turned to fits of laughter and embarrassment as I could hear only my mother ranting on and Dr. P just nodding calmly and looking up from underneath my gown.
I thought, this idea must be a monologue someday.
I think she scolded him or ripped him a new one or just reiterated my feelings in a Shirley McClain - Terms of Endearment kind of way.

Dr. P agreed to cancel the test.
Surye told me everything would be ok.
Que Sera, Sera, Whatever Will Be, Will Be. (That's how you say her name).
For the love of all things good and holey (pun intended) would someone please give this girl a cookie!?!??!

When I knew I was literally off the hook, Dr. P told me that he would review all of my tests, charts and files and that I didn't need to see God again. He would handle my situation and we'll go from there.

This story is to be continued. Although I didn't have the test today and I am weary with emotional exhaustion and in physical pain, I am taking an hour off to rest before going off into the world again.
And you bet your ass I'm comin' back home with a cookie.

-Laurie

Yoga is Cool

Yoga is cool. It might not have been in the 60's. In fact, it was probably pooh-poohed as an elitist group of hairy arm pitted women and men speaking in tongues and getting in touch with their chakras, whatever that means.

Ok, this is what I thought it was when I was a teenager, dating a boy whose dad owned a yoga studio on the upper east side in Manhattan.

When I first went to the boy's home, to 'hang out', he showed me around his suburban NY estate and took me to the back room of his house where his dad's 'studio' was and where, still engrained in my memory, I saw a group of women and men, sitting cross-legged Indian style, in white turbans, eyes closed and chanting words that were certainly not English.

What are they doing??, I thought. I didn't dare ask. I just wanted to hang out with the boy. The whole thing freaked me out.

Cut to, my early 20's. I'm working at a nightclub and hosting a music show that aired Friday nights on NBC. We shot during the day so I basically slept, two hours a night and was up and working all the rest of the hours of the day.

One day, I met with the executive producer of the show at a 'healthy' restaurant in Venice, CA. He was that hippie type of guy that 'did' yoga and always acted 'Zen'.

He could see how stressed out and strung out I was by simply existing in the world.

He gave me a book called, 'The Miracle of Mindfulness' by Thich Nhat Hanh. It's a manual on meditation.

Ok, I thought. Now, I'm going to have to find time to sit still and think about nothing? This is going to go over really well with my schedule, I thought.

I still can't pronounce the author's name, but my dear friends, that book changed my life.

It explained how, by doing simple tasks during the day and focusing your attention solely on those tasks, you are in meditation. How often do we, cook dinner while on the phone and multi-tasking a myriad of other things?

We are always multi-tasking!! We are rarely looking at our task and just 'doing' our task without thinking of the next thing and the next thing.

Dang, did that guy get it right. He knows me so well.

If you asked me ten years ago, if I ever thought I would be teaching yoga, I would have told you that you were crazy.

My first yoga class at 21, I stepped in to the studio all loud mouthed and ignorant, didn't know I was supposed to take my shoes off or anything. I left the studio, quiet and, well, still ignorant. It didn't bode well with me. Many classes later, I still didn't 'vibe' with whatever this 'yoga' and 'meditation' was. I didn't understand, but that is because I didn't have the right teachers. There was nothing wrong with the teachers that I had, I just didn't 'get' it. Their style didn't work with the person I was.

But here's the thing, sometimes it takes a while to find the right teacher to take you to the place where yoga can be designed for you, not what images you might have of what yoga is.

Even now, yoga has been made trendy and accessible to people, but not ALL people. There are still so many people who think they can't do yoga because they can't touch their toes.

They are overweight or can't focus or don't have the time or whatever. Yoga is more of a lifestyle workout than anything else and it takes some time to find out what and where that yoga is for you.

I found this great studio in Hell's Kitchen on the west side of NYC that was the right fit for me.

There were no hairy armpits or skinny ladies telling me to feel the breath in my toes. (There was actually a part of me that thought, am I really supposed to feel breath in my toes? Is that actually physically possible?)

Yea, what did I know?

The teachers were from all 'traditions' and 'styles' of yoga and accessible to me.

Me, who was an overweight teenager, battled an eating disorder and an addiction to diet pills and other unhealthy ways of living. On the flip, I was also a marathon runner, who couldn't touch her toes. I was never a gymnast or dancer which you may see a lot of in studios. I didn't think this type A gal could ever be still long enough to order a non-fat latte let alone move my way over an hour to a place of stillness within that got me thinking....

I'm just tired of living outside of myself, working tirelessly and spending my energy like it was cash on a shopping spree, focusing on pleasing others or my parents or society, trying to do what is right or what I 'should' do.

Let's just take a moment....

And that moment brought me here...

I'm still here...

Are you with me people?

I had never lived inside of my actual body and let what was inside lead and dictate my decisions and passions in my external life.

I'm not getting all spiritual yet, am I?

Seriously though, I found a place to find myself and it eventually lead me to teaching all this stuff because I was THE person against all of what I thought yoga was, only to discover and create what yoga IS to me.

Yes, it's one of those things that you have to be there to get, but I promise you, you can find and get it no matter how insane your schedule and daily life demands are.

Here's the fun part.

Yoga can be whatever you would like it to be for yourself. That's the way those in India did it and do it and that's what we can do.

Yoga can start at anytime with any BODY.

Teenagers can benefit from yoga, as their body is something new every day. It's something, as adults, we long since ceased 'discovering.' But as a teenager, we are just starting that journey. We're not sure what to do with all these new thoughts and feelings that come up as we are growing up. Couple that with school, exams, friends and extracurricular activities and you are looking at a difficult transitionary period. A time, that if neglected, can keep you confused and a little unfocussed even into you 20's, i.e., me. I was all over the place and I needed a good and healthy place to put all of this energy.

If I only knew then, what I know now. If I had a kid and/or a teenager, they would be doing yoga right out of the womb!!

With yoga, you not only get a physical workout, but you get in your body enough to get a mental workout. And by mental work-out I mean you literally work out the things you no longer mentally need to hang on to so that you can be present in all of your activities, more productive and of all things, more FOCUSED.

Woo Hoo!

Yoga works the bod, but in the mind it keeps you focused on what is important and what needs to go away. In this day and age, that is super important. We are inundated with so many stimuli from TV and technology to the friends and family in our lives that hold our attention.

With yoga, we can find out just how important all of those things are and put in perspective the absolute things we need to put our attention towards.

Priorities people!

You might also find that by doing yoga, you can find other things to find 'yoga' in. Yoga translated from the ancient Indian language of Sanskrit, means, union.

Many people I work with might discover that the actual 'poses' of yoga don't get them feeling Zen, but they find that feeling we talk about when they go for a run or take a spin class, make dinner, watch Oprah while having a cup of tea or even take the dog for a walk. It's about being mindful in your moments not mixing the moments up and missing it all.

Yoga is not limited to a studio where you have a mat, don a cute top and pants and do downward dog.

Not to mention the fact that yoga can be extremely bonding. I can't tell you how many girlfriends or mothers and daughters that I work with or husbands and wives that, in our time together, there is no blackberry or facebook or homework or e-mails popping up in your face.

There is just a mat or two, some breathing, moving and good 'ol chatting and catching up. It's nice to be quiet when you are doing your practice, but a lot of people I work with use this time to just be with each other, be quiet or talk. There is nothing more yogic to me than that.

My image of yoga has changed over the years as I have changed. Yoga has become my life because it is how I live my life. 90% of it is off the mat and outside of the studio, but yoga is what helps me stay fit, focused and happy. I can live with a grade of 90%. It's an A+ to me and on the permanent record of life; I can live with that score.

Be good to yourselves, call your mother and drink a lot of water. And moisturize a lot in this dry heat.

-Laurie

More car references...

I know, I can't stop. But I'm on the road so much; it's where I draw a lot of my inspiration.
I realized the other day that after two strange altercations with drivers, both of which went all postal, following me or riding along side of me honking their horn and yelling profanities for reasons, I seriously don't know, that it might have been the first time, in that moment, I didn't even acknowledge their existence or their problem with me or really, themselves. How's that for a run on sentence.
I was on the phone or listening to my delicious kirtan music or KCRW. When I finally noticed their irrational behavior, I just sang louder or laughed more with my mom on the Bluetooth. It's amazing how she fits in there so well.
I took a moment to realize that I didn't have those crazy feelings bubbling up inside of me when anger surrounded my metallic bubble. I did, however, start feeling really embarrassed for them. What if someone else saw these people goin' nuts on the road? How crazy do they look? And then I don't acknowledge them? How even more embarrassing for them. He he.
Listen up drivers. I know you might be having a bad day, but most probably, even if the car in front of you purposely cut you off because they thought you were driving too slowly, it's more personal to them then it should be to you. Chances are they are harboring anger and self loathing that has 0% to do with you and that they will hold onto somewhere in the fibers of their being and will make them sick. I don't mean to be so blunt. Yes, I do.
I don't go nuts on the road. Seriously, there are a lot of things I can't stand on the road, little habits and things people do. Then I notice that I might do one of those little things, by accident.
Cut some people slack. It might be everyday that you get cut off but it might be the first time the person who cut you off has ever cut someone off because they just didn't see you. They feel bad about it but there is nothing they can do. It's done. So don't make it your responsibility to feel anything either way about.

The more you react to a situation, the more a situation is created. The more you just let it go, chances are, the other freak on the road, now embarrassed for making a mountain out a mole hill, will have no other choice but to let it go too. Perhaps after saying some really mean things about you.

Zen and the Art of Driving 101.

That's me.
Enjoy your day.
Wishing you an open road and no crazies!
-Laurie

Kick my asana...

I love my girlfriends and their children. I'm not a big fan of chatting with them on the phone and having half a conversation with them as they are feeding Lucas or Hannah or Zion.

"No, honey, you can't eat that. Don't touch that. What were you saying, Laurie?"

And yet, aren't I the pot calling the kettle...
'cause I'm guilty too.
No, I don't have human children, but the children I speak to whilst you are on the phone with me will most probably be the Honda or Lexus in front of me.
"Please drive Lexus! A yield sign means yield, not stop. Are you asking for a written invitation, Escalade? The light is green. What were you saying, dear friend or mom?"

We are, as a society, multitasking individuals, capable of handling, sometimes successfully, multiple things at one time and rarely tuning into to what is really happening to us, within or being present in the actual moment; feeding a child or talking to a friend. It's both being done, yes, but probably half assed.

And yet, that time for singular duties must be available to us on some level in order to find the balance and nourishment we desperately need for ourselves in order for us to be able to give more to those around us, children and Lexus' alike.

When we get to the mat, it is an opportunity to resolve any issues we may be facing internally that we might not be able to handle while holding the little one, the blackberry or the wheel.

The challenges we face on the mat are most probably the same challenges we face in our external life. In the class room, we have just resigned ourselves to shutting up and listening to someone else guide us to a place where, ideally, we can listen to ourselves. It's a quiet voice within that we need to tune into like a radio, sans static and find the clear voice to communicate with. And some of us might never hear that voice, even in yoga. Especially if their is loud music in the room or loud mind noise within. It's a practice and it takes time. Nothing wrong with the loud music playing classes as long as you can find yourself through the noise. Unless, of course, you are going to yoga to avoid yourself and just 'work out' and that's fine too. You can stop reading now and go back to your lunch or phone call or both.

We are given the opportunity, if we are lucky to quiet the noise around us so that we can listen to our needs and passion that drives us out of bed, besides the alarm clock.

When I say, on the mat, that is to say, when I am on the mat. Your yoga might be running a mile or being on the ocean on a surf board.

In brief, which for me means a diatribe, I just want to emphasize how important it is to find what it is that your yoga might be -the place you can find to simply be instead of do.

It's hard, I know, but all of our busy souls can find that union and peace somewhere.

It can be with your child, if you are focussed only on being with your child and not talking to me or listening to the news.

Practice mindfulness in whatever you are doing. Even if you are in traffic, like I am often in.
I escape to the phone. I sometimes call people I can't even stand just to kill the time. And that is all I am doing, killing time.
If I make the most of a sticky situation and just be, think or focus only on the road before me instead of what's next and what I can do, that is being in union.

It might not seem like yoga in the traditional sense but its a lot closer than multitasking and being miserable. If you find zen in multitasking then you are that much closer to enlightenment than I.

Which brings me to another topic of discussion.

I'm not only the hair club president, but I am also a member.
I am not only a teacher, but I am also a student.
I am finding, more and more, when I practice in class, and I've said this before in previous blogs, that teachers try to emphasize what is 'right' and what is 'wrong', not allowing the student to find out for themselves what is and isn't right for them.

Their are so many paths to choose from. When I hear, and its often, "I can't do yoga" or "I tried yoga and was no good," all I want to do is take them into a quiet room and show them just how much they CAN do yoga and maybe even better than I can.

We all have different starting points, physical abilities and limitations. If you practice yoga often, you know that one day on the mat might be a 180 different from the day before. Yoga, as an expressive physical and emotional experience that will challenge you differently each day.

If you've tried yoga once, try it a few times with different styles, different studios and different teachers to find the practice that might resonate with what you need.

FIND OUT WHAT IT IS YOU NEED AND WANT!

Don't let an injury keep you from practicing yoga. I've worked with Chemo patients, injured athletes or regular people with injuries from work or accidents. It's possible.

What's impossible is a closed mind.

Keep your mind open to the possibilities that you can explore in a yoga class or practicing from a book or video if that is where you are at.

Don't let the 'pretty people', the gymnasts, the perfect looking poses, the toned, the label wearing or mat raging individuals that might be next to you keep you from practicing YOUR yoga.

Yoga is like life.

You are going to be exposed to all kinds of people around you. If you can accept them and accept yourself in the moment, you can feel the benefits internally and externally in a yoga class.

There is no 'right' way to do things. Only safe. And if a teacher makes you feel like you aren't doing something right, then most probably, it is not the 'right' class for you. Find another class. There are thousands in LA.

I still remember my first yoga class. I had bleach blonde hair, was caffeinated and barreled into the studio with a big smile and loud voice. I was promptly shuushed and told to take off my shoes and then ignored when I asked what to do next as it was my first time.

I have to say that even in many yoga studios, you won't find the most enlightened and kind people running the show. I've been downright treated rudely and disrespected by many a fine looking peaceful mannered passive-aggressive individual handing me a clipboard, grabbing my credit card and not even looking me in the eye as she or he chats on the phone about Ganesh knows what.

Get over it and don't take it as a personal affront to you.
Don't let that defer you. Just think, they have their own challenges that they are dealing with. Just 'cause they are in a yoga studio behind a desk, doesn't mean they are better than you.

On the other hand, there are so many studios in LA I have experienced that upon walking in the door, the welcoming smiles and encouraging personalities just make you feel at home. Some people like the sterility of walking in, signing in, taking class and walking out. Others like the community and camaraderie to create the experience. To each his/her own. But it's out there for you to find. The right thing is there for you to find.
You just have to look for it or ask me. I'd be happy to tell you where to go. I've been everywhere in LA and can pretty much say that I have had both good and not so good experiences everywhere. A lot had to do with where and what I was coming from too.

Yoga, like anything can become competitive, cutthroat (don't get me started on mat rage) and kind of stressful.
But, 'I can't do yoga' or 'I've tried' is just not good enough. Your yoga is out there for the finding. And it might very well not be doing downward dogs.

Take the time to uni-task. Ask yourself what it is that you need, whether you have an hour and a half to meditate or practice or you barely have the time to get sleep and get the kids out the door to school.

Find that moment of reprieve in your day to search out your yoga.
It's there.
It can simply be smelling a sweet rose or smiling to a stranger on the street.
If it is on the mat and in the studio, realize that perfecting a pose or 'looking' right doesn't always translate into living the perfect life.
Perfect is nothing more than a word in the dictionary.
Search out happiness, balance and mindfulness.
On that note, I must leave and do twelve things at once.
Be good to yourselves, drink lots of water and call your mother.

Jai ma,
Laurie

Slow down to speed up...

I had a very wise client that told me she schedules EVERYTHING in order to have more time. I balked at this at this thinking,
how much work is that?!

I decided I'd give it a try because really, what did I have to lose but more time. I found that the more I scheduled appointments, social engagements, work-outs, phone dates et al, the more it did, in fact, leave room for more things including spontaneity which, in this day and age of technology with instant responses and gratification, can be all too difficult to adjust to. I work mostly with busy moms and dads. Their schedule is hard enough to manage and so I must adapt to their ever changing agenda accordingly.

And driving. If you haven't already noticed, it's something I do a lot of and it's where, instead of finding stress, I find inspiration. Inspiration to bring into my classes and into my own life as lessons. Oh, the lessons on the road.

My dad is a driver in NY and I've asked him for tips.
I feel very connected to him when I hit the battlefield daily and ask myself often, what would my dad do in this or that traffic or dicey road situation? The road is where I see my dad the calmest. Its the rest of his life that I see his frustration, but that's another blog.

When I'm on the road with the crazies riding my bumper, literally in my trunk, offering me no dinner or flowers or romance just gettin' on top of me, I take pause.
Leave him room, I think (my dad in my ear).
And when I find myself getting too close to my neighbor in the front, I say to myself, what the heck am I doing, but wasting my gas to ride his tail.
I think, leave him room.

The lesson my dad always told me - while driving - leave a cushion between you and another car. If someone takes that room by cutting into your lane then leave room between you and him.
This helps work with the flow of traffic and not against it. (He's never even done yoga!!)
It might sound like you end up drivin' like an old lady but I swear it works. The more you slow down instead of racing your heart rate and exhaust, the closer you will get to your destination with ease.

Upon leaving my class at Liberation Yoga in Hollywood tonight and driving home to Santa Monica, I noticed this big ol' SUV darting in front of me and others on the road. She weaved in and out for miles and miles. We apparently lived in the same area because after all that hard work, we ended up at the same light in Santa Monica, all the way from Hollywood!
While I was driving and focussing on the road whilst catching up with friends and listening to my Kirtan music she, when I looked over, was smoking an looked like she was about to pass out from stress.
He he.
Blessings to her, I thought. I hope she finds her peace somewhere else.

If you can find your peace driving, I think I you can find peace anywhere. I haven't mastered it yet but I'm applying the lessons from the great drivers (my dad) and yogis that went before me. The yogis in the Himalayas didn't have to deal with traffic in LA!!

Try slowing down, just a little bit and you'll get there faster if not in the same time you would have using your adrenals.
Just try it.
Please?

Schedule some things if you are finding your schedule to busy. You will soon be able to figure out what is important to do and what is not.

Another big lesson I learned, when my dad became sick, was how much I quickly realized what was important and needed to be addressed in the 'now' and what could be put off. I joke (even though it's not so funny) that there is nothing like Cancer to put things into perspective and fast!

I wouldn't go so far as to advise imagining the above circumstance as your own, but imagine if YOU only had a few more days to REALLY live. What do you need to do right now? Are you doing everything you enjoy and love even if it is stressful at times? If not, get rid of it. Why would you need it if you had thousands of days to live? If someone pisses you off today, is it really going to bother you in 3 years? If not, don't let it bother you now.

I had an extremely stressful day last week where I literally had to be in six areas of town for intense meetings within an hour of each other from 8AM until 9PM. It was an insane day that I shared with a buddy who was along for the ride with me or to just witness how insane my days can be. Although I had moments where I thought my head would pop off, I still look back at that day and wouldn't do anything differently. I had prepared myself that the day would be stressful and I rolled with it where I could and when I got stressed, I belted it out like Patti LuPone when I could. You have to just roll with it when it comes.
Like when you are at the beach and you spot a huge wave. You see it coming and if you are in it, you brace yourself for it's fervor or, you just hold your breath and go under 'till it passes. Both are good choices.

Tell people what you think in the moment (unless they are hurtful thoughts and words). If you don't think quick on your feet, take some time to formulate your thoughts for delivery in a kind and gentle way. Being loving and gentle in your delivery will be more effective then speaking in anger or in haste, even if those feelings come up.
If you are too frightened to confront or stand up for what you want, go through, in your mind, the ideal transaction that you would want to have with that individual, with all your kind but specific wants and needs expressed and received.
See how that resonates within your body. Perhaps all you needed was to picture that scene, vent into a notebook, to a friend or to your mom. That might be good enough for you to move on from a tense feeling within or situation with someone else.

The list of to dos will always be there. As long as you are moving, breathing, creating and accomplishing goals, there will be more to do.

So chill the freak out while you are doing your tasks and you will feel a whole lot better. You will feel the same bliss doing your to dos as you do whilst doing your downward dog.
At least that is what I keep trying to do.

That's one of my lessons (to learn AND to teach)

If you are passionate and full of ideas, work through a few of them. Your life may or may not be enough time to do everything you want, but you can try, with zeal, the things that you are drawn to the most.
Trust me, I've tried to do it all. And I'm not even married or have kids. Do the things that make you feel the most free, enabled, healthy and all the rest of the crap will move out of the way. Schedule your life in order to provide it with the room you need for the good things to come in and maybe the stray car, but that's ok. Cause you will leave more room and more room will be found and filled with what you want and what you need.

I have this dynamic girlfriend who called me the other night to work through some things in her life. She had so many questions that I knew she knew the answers to, but I let her work it out. I asked her to try on, like a fabulous new dress, the decision to say no to her situation and the decision to say yes to the situation. See how it looks and feels outside and in. Maybe walk around the apartment for a few days with the dress. Look at yourself in the mirror, at different angles, sitting down, bustin' a move. What FEELS most right will be evident trying on BOTH decisions.

I've done that quite often. Even with dresses I wasn't sure I wanted to keep. And with many other decisions. Let me tell you. I have a lot of returns and store credits. And that's ok.

I'm not the best yoga teacher. I don't know who is. I know I have a great intuition about who comes into the room an what they need. I think it works out most of the time. But, all I really know is what I can give, what I've been trained to do, what I have experienced and the mistakes I've made to learn from and teach from.

I saw this yummy supima cotton t-shirt at Santa Monica Power Yoga. It was forest green with that burn out effect of worn in deliciousness.
At the bottom of the shirt was fancily inscribed, 'my life is my message'. I was instantly repelled. And yet, I know that's all I can do is use my life as my message.
I did try it on. It was indeed yummy. It was also 40$ and the money didn't partially go towards the rainforest or kids in Africa so I passed.
And I'm quite fine with that decision.

Slow down, just a little bit, me and everybody. Take a breath and we'll all get where we need to go faster and in a better state of mind (and with better karma instead of cutting people off). Try on your wants and needs in question.
Be good to yourselves. Drink lots of water and call your mother. If you don't like your mother, call your touchstone. If you don't have one, you can write me.

Jai Ma,
(glory or hail to the divine/mother)
Laurie

Yogasm

Yea, I wrote it.

It's possible and not in the way you are thinking.

I look forward to taking class with Govindas and Radha every week at 4:30 at Santa Monica Power Yoga. It's a recurring appointment on my blackberry. I get very disturbed when I can't go as its the one thing I really treat myself to and the one thing I know will transition me sweetly from a long week to a restful and recuperative weekend. Needless to say, in light of my schedule, good but very busy, I have not seen them in over a month.
In fact, MY yoga practice has been dormant for close to that length.
But, I went today.

Yes, there was some moaning involved but just because my muscles were all wound up and tense and, listen everyone, when things are goin' on, whatever it might be, it needs to be released.
Have you ever had a really annoying encounter or something fantastic happen and it makes you 'feel', physically, a certain way? I mean, you know, in your mind you 'feel' something, but in your body?
Well, those feelings need to go somewhere. They can go in a conversation with your mom or my mom, I can give you her phone number if you'd like. Or chatting with a friend, getting a massage or going for a run or to the gym to 'work it out'. There's a reason they call it a work out.
Work outs started to work things out. It did. You can google it. Then they figured out all the benefits physically. If you watch Madmen, you'll understand. Those people, back in that time, were all toxic- smoked and alcoholed up that they screwed themselves physically and took out all their frustration in negative ways. I know, its a TV show but it's based on a time period. Ask the people who were livin' and workin' in the 60's and 70's in NYC. Well, actually, you can ask anyone living in NYC now. Just kidding.
I love NY...it's my hometown. But they are all wound up, those crazy bananas!!

I digress...
I can release in yoga class and meditation. I can honestly say that in my yogic career, as a practitioner and teacher, I can't remember 'letting go' of so much at one time then in that class today and Radha (the most beautiful girl in the universe with her sweet, sweet voice, wasn't even there today).
And I was in child's pose 40% of the class.

It was like yogic surgery and Govindas was my trusty surgeon, telling me what I might expect and how I might feel. I scrubbed in as well! I slowly cut in, looked around and decided what needed to be removed, what needed immediate attention and what was doing really well inside.
I'm forever grateful that I can still find teachers that allow me to feel the way that class always does.
A combination of kirtan (devotional singing or chanting), slow movement, philosophy and quiet meditation, they allow us to explore the deepest parts of our practice and our lives.
I only hope that my interpretation of yoga and guiding others might, on a different level, inspire me the way they do.

They are so different from how I teach. There are some times I wish I could reflect what they do in my classes but that is why there are so many of us teachers in Los Angeles. We are all so different and give our gifts by the way we interpret the art. I know that the shared energy of the experience I have with all teachers and students inform what I do in my classes and my life.

I can't express enough how yoga is the absolute for me. Like writing, performing, running, fitness and Pilates, it is the way I can express myself fully in this crazy world.

So this, yogasm, is just that, the culmination of perfect and uncomfortable bliss.

I hope you can find yogasm in the classes I teach or the yoga you create in your life.

Be good to yourselves, find your y spot, drink lots of water and call your mother.

Divinely inspired,
Laurie

What's the deal...

6 times this week, I was cut off by truck/SUVs/4x4s donning McCain or Bush stickers. Hmmmm, was it something my Ford Focus said or is it something they said.
I'm just sayin'

John and Kate + 8

I had a meeting with my manager this afternoon. We discussed the fact that at this point, 'I' am currently managing two careers successfully at this point. Acting and teaching. I'm grateful for the support of a really great team behind the performance aspect of my career and grateful for the clients and students that keep showing up to my classes and vividly coloring my life.
We are in discussion on how to combine the two 'loves of my life'.

Today I decal-ed my car, LA advertising style, pic attached and I'm so happy that I have a terrifically talented friend that designed me my promotional logo and a wonderfully dedicated student that referred me to Production Graphics in North Hollywood that did the work very inexpensively. It looks great.

With all of this work and gratefulness, I find myself challenged with the delicate balance of being two people, sometimes at the same time. It makes it difficult to manage at times.

I remember the days when I was working in an office, temping or long term 'temping' at law firms or investment banks where I thought I would tear my eyelashes out in disgust or that my head would pop off in an instant if I had to don a blazer, hose and smile one more day for the tune or an hourly slightly minimum wage.

These days, I design my own days and sometimes those days are out of my control. Auditions and client schedule changes all the time.

Swaha, the loosely translated sanskrit word for 'whatever' is my mantra because as a yogi, I have to go with the flow, otherwise the flow stops with me and that would be...bad.
Flow is good and my daily thought is peace in spontaneity. I try to structure what I can and allow for the sand of life to fill up the spaces in my jar of gems.

I don't like watching television. Most of the television I watch is just to get the vibe of what's out there 'cause I might be up there with'em some day soon. Or, to take a habit from my mother, the television is on in the background whilst I'm doing other things, which just ends up being noise. Not a good habit but a guilty pleasure at best.

I'm liking that I'm mixing three of my loves, television, performing and fitness altogether in my fitness videos. What a joy.
But for the most part, compartmentalizing (an activity I learned from a mommy/small business owner) is key.

So, in essence, my days are truly living from moment to moment and that is a wonderfully yogic view of my days that start at 6AM and end at 10PM.

I fit in the nooks of my day what I can. At the end of the day, though, when I'm fried and can't take another thing into my life, I do, in fact, turn to the tube, for a show on TLC called, John and Kate Plus Eight. This couple has eight kids. This show chronicles their life as a couple and managing the craziness of raising eight freekin' beautiful and insanely individual children. They live in PA. I love their accents. I love John and Kate and the eight kids, especially Aiden and his little coke bottle bottom glasses. I love the way, as a married couple, they deal with each other. I love the way they fight and make up. I love the life they create for these kids and how they manage problems. I know they have financial and personal support from TLC, but I swear, sitting back at the end of the day and popping on their life makes me mellow into my own.

Its like watching the puppy bowl around the holidays. Its this zen like bliss just watching lives unfold. Well the puppies you just watch on a mock football field play with each other, but it's like they are subliminally sending messages to relax and let go and in a pinch, these programs can be my yoga!

Of course, my mom got me into this show. She was into it first and I followed. She was also Rachel Ray's first fan. I was her second and then she exploded and became annoying.

Anyway, there is no educational purpose of this blog but to say that sometimes, when things get crazy in your life and business has fried your existence and meditation and yoga are not an option but a bottle of wine or Ben and Jerry are, turn your head, man and turn on the tube to the channel of TLC and listen to Kate in a Philly accent I swear I'm starting to speak in and all will be well.

Be well, drink lots of water and call your mother.

Shanti,
Laur

Blog is the new boyfriend...

Just thought this was funny...
Someone asked me how single life was. It's been four months and I don't really think of 'being single' like, ok, now I need a game plan, get online or go to parties and meet people.
After eight years, I don't really know what any of this means. I didn't even know what single meant when I was in my early 20's. I never thought and I never looked. I was always lucky to find amazing men that took residence in my life for a time.
Most, if not all of them are still in my life on different planes.
Another amazing man told me today that he thought I was more like a man than a woman except that I looked like a woman.
I knew what he was saying but still laughed. I go to the bathroom faster than any woman I know and find that women, in general, give me a bad name. He He.
I love the women and men in my life but being single, well, I guess whatever time was spent being in a relationship is now being spent here, right here, at this blog. So there.
My blog is my new boyfriend and I guess if I were to really think about it, this blog is exactly what I would want in a boyfriend.
I don't need much but he would probably have to deal with a ton of words coming at him at warp speed and going on tangents regularly. Blog....ahhh....I love you blog.
Unconditional love.
Hmmmm.
Be good.

Chanting

I love chanting.
It gets me in the meditative zone that sometimes sitting in still silence doesn't get me to.
I love chanting in class.
The collective sound and feeling grounds our energies and unifies our spirits.
However, I do think it's important to know what you are chanting.
When I take a class and hear a new chant that is not explained and don't understand, I won't take part. Why would I. I could be saying anything!
To create a feeling of community in a class, understand what, how and why you are chanting a mantra.
When alone and creating your connection to the universe, it's important to me to know what and who I am singing to.
Here are some great chants from simple to advanced that you might find yourself doing in class. These may or may not be explained in the class you are attending.
Try on one or a few and see which ones resonate within.
If you aren't chanting these mantras in class, try chanting them while driving or washing the dishes or while you are in the shower.
You will find a feeling of peace come over you, within you and create calm and peaceful energy outside of you.

Aum/Om - affirming the divine presence that is the universe. The unification or thread that links us all. The original and most powerful mantra. The primal sound of the universe in its essential manifestation.

So hum, hum sa - I am that, that is me. We are one. A meditation for just being.

Shanti, Shanti, Shanti - Peace, peace, peace

Om Namah Shivaaya - I bow to the Lord Shiva, the peaceful one who embodies all and is the creator of the universe.

Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu- May all the beings in all the world be peaceful and happy and free and may the thoughts and actions of my own life contribute in some way to that happiness and to that freedom for all.

Om Swayam Sresh-thaya Namaha (om swah-yahm shresh-tah-yah nah-mah-hah) Mantra for excellence. Om and salutations to my inner state of excellence. Bring your everyday self in alignment with your higher self which is already perfect as a reflection of the divine.

Gayatri Mantra
Om Bhur bhuvas svaha
Thath savithur varaynyam
Bhargo dheyvasya dhimahih
Dhyoyonah pratchodhay-yath

Hear it here...
http://www.esnips.com/doc/78b94257-07a9-458c-aa16-a04293e30bb1/Gayathri-Mantra-Ghana-Patha----Srivatsa-Ramaswami

On the absolute reality and its planes, on the finest spiritual light, we meditate, as remover of obstacles that it may inspire and enlighten us.
We worship the word that is present in the earth, the heavens and that which is beyond. By meditating on this glorious power that gives us life, we ask that our minds and hearts be illuminated.

Sa Ta Na Ma-Kundalini Meditation meaning totality, creation, dissolution, regeneration. (rhythmically tap the thumbs and fingers of each hand in the rhythm of the mantra.

Om Gum Ganapatayei Namaha- Ganesha mantra. For seen or unseen obstacles which seem to be standing in the way of your general or specific progress or achievement.

Om Shrim Klim Maha Kaxmieh Swaha - Laxmi Mantra- abundance for you and for all

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo - Buddhist mantra of devotion to the mystical law of cause and effect.
For improving health, happiness, wisdom and compassion. To manifest enlightenment in our lives and potential as individuals to create thriving and peaceful lives.

Be good to yourselves, drink lots of water and call your mother.
Shanti, Om,
Laurie

Time and music and driving and...YOGA

I swear I lose years of my life every time I get on the road in Los Angeles, which could either mean I'm a zygote or a geriatric.
Music is my saviour in the car. I used to think I was on the cusp, discovering the right music to share with the world at the right time. It was the time. I was so lucky to be a music journalist in my late teens and early twenties. I had access to EVERYTHING new and delightful and appropriate for my age and emotions. And the parties!!
When I was younger, I would hear a band and it would be mine. I would always be surprised when someone else felt the same passion for an artist that I soooo found and kept to myself or shared only with my small circle of friends.
I remember seeing musicians’ play in sold out houses and thinking, no, you are mine. And yet, sharing them with others in this communal feeling of respect, love, admiration and identification was bliss. Poignant, heartbreaking, memory-making, boy-crushing bliss.
I test out everything in the car, my play list for class, my writing, and my workouts, all to the music I've stumbled upon that week and it's new, every week.
I love when people comment in my classes on the music I've played but the secret is out. I rely on KCRW's morning becomes eclectic, other teachers and my friend Becky in San Diego and sister, Karin in NY to supply me with what is, the soundtrack of my existence.
I'm still a contradiction, I admit. I will always enjoy Euro pop, trance, house, hip-hop and rap. That's what keeps me pumped up, energetic, running and jumping. Gone are the days of nightclubs for me. My drunken dancing has turned into running miles on the beach, in the sober bliss of daylight.
My after-hours techno has turned into lounge, trance, shoe gazing, mantra, chants and calm sweet melodies to move through yoga poses, meditation, sleep, reflection and writing.
My most favorite thing is looking in the mailbox and receiving a disk that my sister or friend made for me and I love nothing more than making cd mixes for my friends as the travel, work, run, do yoga or drive in their car.
That art, the mix tape of my era, is still one of the things I hold onto from my youth that no wrinkle can take away.
It creates an experience in my yoga classes, creates peace through my day and keeps me stress free whilst driving the LA streets and freeways.
Music, it's what gives me years to my life and brings me back to the moment. It provides me with memories to the moment. Harmonious snapshots of existence.
Things I'm listening to now....
A.R Rahman
Travis Namaste
Davide Swarup
M83
Morgan Doctor
Rocco
Nightmares On Wax
Deadmau5
Basshunter

Music is a gift.

Be good to yourself. Drink lots of water; call your mother and listen, to the sweet sounds in your life.
Shanti, OM,
Laurie

Diet. You asked so...

I'm gonna tell ya...

First of all, I'm on the road every day, all day in most of the great neighborhoods of our great city, Los Angeles, training, teaching and yes, auditioning, shooting yoga/fitness videos, TV shows, meeting friends, blogging, workin' out, shopping et al.
I'm busy.
And so are you.

Sometimes, when people ask me what I've been doing all day, I can't answer them in one sentence. I feel my days are so full and sometimes there isn't enough time for a break. I'm just stating the obvious. Sometimes I long for days of leisure but this is the way it is now, and I'm not complainin'.

I don't have kids but if you looked at my kitchen you would think I did. Everything in it is pureed or Zip-locked into portion sized, ready to go, meals and snacks. I know its not ideal, but when you are on the go, like me or like many of the mommies I work with, you need to have healthy fuel ready for you at a moments notice for you and your kids and your sanity. I set aside time to put all of this together and it’s a Virgo thing I really enjoy. I do. I get into the organization, segregation and control of it all. I always thought I was another, more glamorous sign like Leo or Cancer or Pisces, but alas, I'm a Virgo, the freekin' work horse and devotee to others - through and through and the symptoms of my sign are showing up more and more as I age. Yippee.

Although I like compliments, I'm not lookin' for them, but I know that I can attribute my body and the way it looks to what I do and what I eat.

Being an overweight kid and battling an eating disorder through my teen and early adult years, aside, fitness and nutrition is a true joy, passion and if you wanna go there, obsession of mine that I have turned into a healthy career for myself.

So, preface/diatribe over, ok, maybe not quite yet, here are my recommendations for tasty, inexpensive, snacks/meals that I eat throughout the day.

It's hard for me to actually eat meals when I'm gone from 7AM-9PM at night so everything must fit into my little cooler in little Tupperware and zip locks and thermoses just like my dad, who drives the streets of NYC everyday for his job. I feel closer to him, knowing everyday, we are both battling different concrete jungles, using our driving savvy and then enjoying small interludes during the day to eat and in my case listen to NPR or great new music and really enjoy whatever part of this great city I am in while chowing. The only difference between my dad's experience and mine, my mom makes his meals the night before and I miss my mom's crust cut sammies. He reads novel upon novel and can look upon the FDR or West Side highway or Empire State Building whilst noshing.

Breakfast of Champions
OK, as soon as I wake up, I just push a button and the coffee is there. Magic!! The coffee fairy (moi) preps it the night before. I know, right? Crazy Virgo. I steam a 1/2-cup of vanilla soymilk for it.

1/2 cup of Fiber one cereal. Any of 'em are great. It's the best fiber cereal on the market and trust me, I have tired THEM all. 1/2 a cup of Danon light and fit yogurt. Again, tried ALL of them and this is the tastiest and the least amount of calories for a yummy cereal blend.
1/2 a cup of raspberries/ blueberries or banana.
Oatmeal is also a great option. I turn to this in the fall-Spring months. Kashi has the best protein/fiber ration but Weight Watchers and Quaker also have good options. Go organic when you can but just look at the labels. Don’t go over 8 grams of sugar and make sure you see the words WHOLE, no enriched. You want to eat the purest thing you can get, even if its in a box!

SO, BAM, I've already had 60% of my fiber needs for the day and 25% of my calcium, what up!!

I add 1-2 egg whites either hard-boiled or for extra protein if I know I have a long day and/or feel sluggish and need more protein, will work out or worked out hard the previous day or am nearing my cycle (we need the protein ladies!!)
And before you say, my goodness you are an anorexic for eating so little in the morning, wait, I'm not finished.
And, in case you are one of those people thinking, how can you eat so much in the morning????
For years, YEARS, I didn't eat b-fast and I always carried extra weight. It's true b-fast IS the most important meal of the day...even for losing weight, so listen up!

Technically, this is not a sufficient b-fast to carry to one to lunch. If you aren't eating till noon because you work a desk job, I would recommend you make an egg white scramble with mushrooms/peppers or seasonal veggie of choice, tblsp of cheese and multi grain toast (fiber one or Thomas' whole grain eng. muffin) and/or add another 1/2 cup of cereal and fruit.

If you are me or a mommy on the go or any girl on the go (can't speak for guys, sorry, I will have to make a separate menu for you and you can ask me after blog for that) continue with the aforementioned b-fast and keep going.

I, must dash to my first client, after I meditate for 10 minutes and set my schedule for the day.

After my very first hour of teaching I will most likely indulge in the other half of the banana from my b-fast or a hard-boiled egg white or half a Luna teacake. Then my next client.

After my second client I will probably half a half (La Tortilla Factory) tortilla with Justin's almond butter/handful of carrots or apple with said almond butter.

I'll also keep water up to 23oz. every few hours.

This will take me to lunch.

That whole b-fast and in between client meals is about 400-500 calories, which is completely sufficient for a 'first' meal. I can't 'work' on a full stomach as much of my work is demo-ing exercises and postures so I need to 'feel' as light as possible whilst having the proper balance of fat/protein/carbs fueling me mentally and physically.

Lunch is salad with tuna/chicken or tofu/meat substitute. I prefer to be vegetarian, but my lifestyle and body type has never been successfully supported by vegetarianism. Do what's right for you, but for me, when eating animal products and take it how you will, make an offering of gratitude to that which gave its life for you to eat. That's what I do and you can roll your eyes all you'd like, its good to stretch the eyes.
Chicken of the sea Ahi tuna steaks, whole foods wild salmon or Quorn meatless and soy free naked chik'n cutlets are great and about 150 cal a portion. They are the purest, storable, quick, low sodium, high protein choices.
I'll add baked peas, raisins, vinegar, mustard, legumes (lentils, black/kidney beans) to the mix to make it crunchy, yummy and eclectic.

Sometimes I feel like going back to my youth and I'll make a tortilla (LaTortilla Factory-high fiber/low carb) with Boar's Head Oven gold Chicken breast (low sodium) with Sargento (skim) Swiss and mustard (I make my own and will give you the recipe if you'd like- from the master cleanse book-YUM), and eat a couple little Persian cucumbers and 100 cal pack Pringles or kettle baked chips (120 cal).
Lunch is usually 300 calories. That ain't bad for somethin' soooo good.

During the fall/winter, I make my own soup broth, takes some time, more time than here or if you are in a pinch, use Wolfgang's veggie broth as base and add whatever beans, veggies and meat/substitute you would like. I puree seasonal veggies with skim milk and seasoning and store in freezer bags until I make my broth. I make a mean carrot, lentil, fresh ginger that rivals erewhon and whole foods and will give you that recipe if you would like.
Making soup became a meditation for me. On Sundays I would passionately put together these ingredients over hours and store them for weeks to come as a delicious and wonderful lunch/dinner during the week. Portions can range from 90-200 calories depending on appetite.
Campbell’s Harvest Select are also wonderful calorie and sodium conscious alternatives/

If I work out before my evening clients, I'll add another piece of fruit with almond butter and Justin's Maple Almond butter is sold at Starbucks for .35 cents and is 100 cal.
I might add my 16 piece almonds and tblsp of raisins or blueberries. These are all prepped in my little ziplocks. You get'em from the store and immediately put them in their place before over indulging. It really is quick and easy.
These snacks round up to about 200 calories

Dinner is steamed veggies with the leanest meat possible. For beef, I choose 96/4, which my mother still doesn't think exists but she's in NY where apparently they only have 90/10 lean protein.
Beef/Turkey or ground chicken. Spinach is great for me, as I need the iron.
I also enjoy lentils; the beluga from Trader Joes with the Trader Joes Spinach sauce is yummy-magic.
Uncle Ben's has a delish portion controlled wild rice, nuke in a bag goodness that is only 200 calories per serving.
Dinner makes the calorie count from 400-500 calories.

I always crave something sweet at the end of the day and have done my best to find the best little treats in town as guilty free as possible which is hard when you are raised Catholic with mostly Jewish friends.

Duncan Heins warm delights are the big indulgence, 150 calories of brownie/cookie goodness (not really so bad, eh?)

Jello Choc or dark choc 60 cal pudding with cool whip light is 75 calories in total
Weight Watchers has great mini cakes. Stay away from the cookies. You will be disappointed.
Fudge Pudge is a great, guilt free brownie mix you can get in most stores. You can make the whole batch or per portion. Mix with yogurt. About 100 calories.

I have an emergency stash of MY ULTIMATE FAVORITE SNACK, Whole Foods Turkey Jerky. I’ve tried EVERY jerky on the market and they are super tough and loaded with sodium. The WF brand is protein in a pinch and great when you need that extra lift in the day and I don’t mean botox or Starbucks!!

My whole day is about 1500-2000 without any guilt at all and I get what I want. I get my indulgence in sweet and salty and I get fueled in the proper proportion of vitamins and nutrients that I need to be a single woman in her 30's. HA!

Of course I take supplements like calcium because I run a lot but talk to your doctor, nutritionist or herbalist for the things you need to add to your diet. And I mean add. Get most of what you need from fruits and veggies and lean protein. Processed food should be used sparingly and I only use it for the enjoyment factor, so I don't feel like I'm restricting.
Your height, weight, age and activity level all play into what you should be eating.

Be wise.

This is what I do, cause enough of you wanted to know.
By no means is it what you should be doing but only a guideline or recommendation for choices you can make.

2nd of all, I know seems like ages ago. Just move!! Move for 30 minutes a day 5-7 days a week. I include dancing around in your living room to great music as part of movement. I also include housecleaning as well. Just get up off the couch even if you are watching TV.

Be good to yourself, drink lots of water and call your mother.
Shanti,
Laurie

It just doesn't matter...

who you are. We all look foolish wearing a bluetooth attached to our ear. I'm so glad it's a law while driving in LA, but really, not one of us looks cute.

Lesson- October 8, 2008

Lessons Yoga Blog 10.11.08

Look at any yoga book and all of the postures will look different. The form, structure and alignment can change with each tradition, but one thing remains the same; if you look at the faces of the practitioners, most probably you will see the face of Samadhi, bliss. This is what we look for in yoga. It is important to be safe, whatever you do with your body, however you move it and whatever you put into it.
It is important to root yourself in the discipline of your choice. Iyengar, Ashtanga, Vinyasa Krama, Kundalini and the list goes on. But once you have committed yourself to a practice, it's important to venture out on your own (or in the class environment) to make the practice your own and find the posture inside of your heart and mind.
Might sound a little out there. Let's look at it this way, if you listen to the safe and proper alignment and cues of a good teacher in order to feel a posture in a deeper way or rediscover something new about the posture, that is one step. Another step is that you must use what you have learned in your previous practices in union with how you feel in that particular moment and what you have set out as your intention for your practice. Then make the pose happen. It's like painting a picture and deciding what colors to use that day.
Your postures and practice will look and feel different every day.
I will rarely correct a student that is obviously from another tradition and decides to do his/her pose in a way that is different from what I am cuing. I will, however, correct a student if she/he is clearly not body aware in a pose and could harm themselves by doing the pose. There is a difference.
I have a peeve. I'm not a huge fan of students who jump back to a plank (Ardha Chattarunga) and not Chattarunga. To me, and it's just how I learned, it's unstable for the shoulder's and can be too jarring on the rotator cuff. People still do it even though I'm a broken record about it. It started somewhere and I'm not sure where but people continue to do it in my class. Maybe it's because I've been verbally abused in some Bikram and Ashtanga classes (I still enjoy and practice these traditions, just not with those teachers anymore) that I just can't stomach the idea of drilling in the 'right' way of doing something if it takes you out of the bliss or intention of your practice.
I certainly don't want other students looking around and wondering about the safety of the students around them in my class. Believe me folks; I've got them covered.
Ultimately, the point of yoga is to move your way into stillness and we do that with breath, body and mind work.
The workout part is great. If that's all you want, that's all you'll get. But if you are in it to go deeper, you will get there with and without the teacher in the room.
Yoga, again, like a broken record, I am, and comma happy, is your own journey and is a practice mostly off the mat. It's a lifestyle choice. That choice can simply be to come and challenge yourself a few hours a week and that is a good choice.
But it really doesn't end when we walk out of the studio. The real practice is the real world. The mat is simply the place to try things out. Like therapy, but without all the talking and crying and delving into your childhood. Hmmm.
It's a place to explore and play. Try things out there and then test it in your day to day. Get rid of anything that isn't working for you and try again. Yoga is the teacher that keeps on teachin'.
But if a teacher suggests something that doesn't resonate for you, don't just do it to do it, question it. Ask why and then decide for yourself if it works for you.
I've had people raise their hands or legs in class to ask a question and quietly pull me aside. That's what I'm there for for cryin' out loud. I'm there for you, using my experience, as I know it on and off the mat and seeing how it can apply to you in your practice. I'm also a personal trainer so if you wanna keep the questions strictly physical, I can answer those for you. I can even tell you how many calories you will probably burn. I can teach you how to stand on your hands though even I need the assistance of a partner or wall to keep me toes pointing upward.
Discard or apply what you need and when you need it.
Your personal practice doesn't necessarily mean you see me one day a week then the rest of the days you are on your own. It's taking what I've guided you through on that day, what you've learned from yourself by opening yourself up then taking it out there.
Some days it works. Some days, not so much.
Some days there is traffic on the 405 at 11AM, other times there ain't.
It's the ebb and flow of life and we need both to grow.
Let yourself experience all of it. When it works and when it doesn't.
Your personal practice doesn't always mean sun salutes. It can simply mean putting your discoveries into practice; facing life with the clarity you find in postures, breathing and meditation and the collective class experiences.
The obstacles that come up for you on the mat will most likely be the same obstacles you face in your daily life. Find the parallels.

I can't tell you how many times I find myself judging my own practice. If only I approached myself with the same non-judgment, gentleness and allowances I do with others. I don't look side to side and wish I was my neighbor or thank goodness I'm not like my other neighbor, no. I look at myself and think, why can't I do this today or any day. And that's how I live my life. That's my test and it's a consistent one at that.
So it is my practice, on the mat, to be gentle with what comes up for me, not to knock it down.
The more I can do that, the more I can do it in life. The great thing about yoga is the awareness. I can be aware of judgment before it takes its course within. As soon as I recognize I am being hard on myself, I can take a step back and correct it, like a pose so that I can replace it with feeling of goodness and non-judgment. It's that simple and that difficult, but a lot better than always judging oneself!

So, there you go. Heart on my sleeve, supporting all traditions of yoga, safety and most of all, Samadhi!
Be good to yourself, drink lots of water (especially in Santa Ana windy season) and call your mother.
Shanti,
Laur

Ahhh, true love...

There's nothing like it. You feel alive. You smile at the drop of the hat. You smile even when you are cut off in traffic. Being in love might be the best feeling in the world and I'll admit I've fallen a few times. However, there is nothing like the opposite of that and the feeling that love has been lost and I admit that I have had my heart broken a few times. Twice this year, in fact. But today, I was renewed and reminded, once again, that love, my truest, deepest love is always here for me, like an old friend, like a new dress, like a great memory, like a smile, like...well, love.
Today, a gloomy day in Los Angeles, rare, but sacred, to me, I found myself feeling lethargic.
Like down-ish. My body was aching and sore. Too much working out, perhaps. Not enough sleep, I'm sure of it.
It's hard to get motivated when you feel sluggish. It took me some time to get my energy up and once I did, there it was, love, in all its glory, standing before me with no judgement of how I looked or what I had eaten that day. It said nothing to me but motioned for me to come to it. So I did.
With a light drizzle, I did it. I put on my running shoes, ear buds and ipod mini and hit the streets. My aching body took a moment but in another moment, it all clicked in.
LOVE.
YOGA.
I saw the ocean before me and the gloomy clouds with patches of sun and smog and rain and darkness and light.
I saw a clear, weekendless kind of clear path on a Saturday in Santa Monica,
Parisian dance club music pounding in my ear and my legs, strong and mighty, passing man after woman after bike after blader, after volleyball player after homeless person. It was me, the ocean, the music and I was alone, in love, in union.
We were making love right there. Passionate, sweet, yummy love.
There is nothing like the rediscovery of love that you have for yourself and the things that you enjoy. Being in love with someONE else is wonderful. Being in love with life and your surroundings is surreal. I am so grateful of the life I have made for myself. The ability to run. The nearness of the ocean and the air that comes off of it. The students that I teach. The people that I meet or the friends that I meet up with. My job. My apartment. My friends. My family. My freekin' blog. The potential. The future. The past. The present.
I'm not being precious, just real and in total and utter love.
When you are able to feel that connection with whatever it is that brings you joy, that is love, the deepest, truest, non-judgemental, indescribable, blog worthy love and I am grateful to be back in it if just for now...

Let yoga find you...

I can't believe I ever had guilt attached to anything related to yoga. It's true. Well, I have a lot of guilt about a lot of things but I'm workin' on that. It's amazing though, because yoga and guilt are like oil and water.

The summer was extremely emotional for me. I noticed that I let go of my meditation practice. I walked past my little alter everyday almost apologetically as the guilt of neglect built up within.
Negative feelings and thoughts get housed. Just like positive thoughts and feelings.
Once you have them, you have a choice to let them go, by acknowledging them and sending them on their way or dismissing them and pushing them further and deeper into the fibers of your emotional and physical being. You don't want the latter. Too much work to do later. He he.

I came to this realization when I removed myself from my day to day and went on a vacay with my family. I was no longer around my little alter space and what I ended up doing with that time I needed to find space was fill it with a run, sit down or sit in the hotel cafe and write or just look around quietly at my surroundings.

Here's the deal, I don't think there is anyone 'up there' giving away enlightenment points for those who can sit still the longest and be quiet.
Quieting the mind is a big challenge and it is a practice. I am, daily, questioned by students about how difficult it is for them to meditate and how much they long to quiet the mind and sit still.
I think everyone is. Especially in an urban environment. It's difficult to draw ourselves away from the constant distraction.

I say, don't put the cart before the horse. Or is it my mom that says that.
Same person.
Don't keep searching for yoga. Let yoga find its way to you.
When I returned back from Canada, I did not return to my meditation practice. Instead of having guilt for this, I simply acknowledged my little space with gratitude and continued on doing the things I needed to feel the same openness, clarity and completeness that I used to by sitting still.
By not putting the pressure on myself to 'have to' sit in meditation, my meditation took other forms and still made me feel just as good.
I miss sitting in my little zen chair but I know it's there for me, like a good friend and will return to me when I am ready.
Your yoga/practice will take many forms in your life. If yoga was just on the mat, well, that would be rather boring. Instead, embrace the idea that yoga will appear to you in many forms. You'll know when you see it. 'Cause you will feel it.
Release the pressure and the negative feelings attached. For, only positive will find it's way to that space of welcomed possibility. It's way nicer than feeling bad.